The rise of the social networking sites, such as Facebook and Twitter, has damaged the quality of friendship. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words
Many people are questioning the effects that social media has on friendship relations. They argue that the creation of social networking sites and applications, such as Facebook and Twitter, has changed in a negative way how we relate nowadays. Despite the many advantages that internet and social networking have brought into modern societies, I believe the quality of relationships has indeed suffered a great impact since the rise of such networking sites.
One of the greatest aspects involved in the media revolution is the fact that, face to face interactions has been lost, and in consequence, there is less affection between friends and colleagues. We are living in an Era where the number of virtual friends, likes, or connections inquires are far more important than the basic elements of sharing and caring, which are the foundation of friendship. We have seen how core values are being forgotten in today's modern societies. People are pretending to live a different life on Facebook, Instagram or any other social media site, just for the mere satisfaction of acquiring as much of social approvals as they could, regardless of the consequences it might bring to them.
Another aspect to consider about social media and networking sites is the loss of privacy. A decade ago, relationships were formed on the basis of trust and respect. Nowadays, however, we find friendships based on virtual common interests, rather than real core values.
In conclusion, although social networking sites have improved many people lives, I believe the quality of friendships nowadays has suffered a great damage.
(Edited by E.C. IELTS - original submission Saturday, 2 February 2019, 10:06 AM)
This is a very good piece of writing. You have really nailed the Cohesion and Coherence area. Your writing is logically organised and flows well. You have excellent arguments which are extended and supported. Perhaps you could extend your conclusion a little more though.
A few little language things to continuing working on. For example below you should not use a comma to separate the clause that follows.
....is the fact that, face to face interactions...
Review further examples of this structure in this activity if you wish.